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03/12/2006: "Turn North"

It's been a bit of a while since the last post. For me, that's due in part to things going on in life, paid work, stuff with friends, places to be. Also, I suspect it has something to do with the focused nature of these past few weeks, leaving less space for the unexepected moment to present itself.

There was a nice one for me today on my way to Kensington Market to get the groceries I'd neglected all week. It was a beautiful afternoon, the College Street sidewalks busy with people. I was somewhat warm in my three layers and a jacket, though I wore my zipper open and that felt pretty good. I soon felt a pee coming on, so I stopped at Starbucks to use the washroom.

My way out, I exited the side door onto Euclid. Again, it was nice just to be outside. The clear blue skies to the north and the cool of the shade from the building were lovely, though I turned back towards College Street to continue my way. Then I noticed there was something less nice about this southern direction, the sky sort of whited-out and marked by cloud, the traffic of the street sort of disturbing. So I caught myself, and decided to go north, seeing where this path might lead.

Not ten steps ahead, there was a sign for a Coach House pointing into an alley. I followed its direction, and passed an art gallery I'd never seen before. Then the alley turned sharp to the right, and as I made the corner, a car came up from behind and I stepped aside to let it pass. The car didn't get too far though, because a cooler and a suitcase and something else kind of large were spread across the alley and blocking the way. I thought weird how stuff like that can really stop someone in their tracks, and I imagined that the driver might have to get out of their car, though that didn't happen. Instead, two boys with hockey sticks came out from behind a fence and moved the stuff aside, allowing the car to continue on until it pulled into one of the alley's garages. When I walked past the two boys, I heard one say to the other, "Well, I don't know what I'll do now, 'cause someone lost my tennis ball."

I sort of wondered like this for awhile and then found my groceries on Bloor Street.

Then tonight, I met my buddy Mike and his squeeze Susie at a pizzeria in the Forest Hill Village. At one point, she was talking about their first date, how she asked him, "Are you into camping, drugs, and might you one day consider moving to the States," because she didn't want to waste her time on someone who couldn't share the things she was into.

And also the instructor of this Arts Administration course I've been taking, this rapidly-aging man with a sagging stomach and the habit of reading his lessons from a well-worn binder, has said on a few different occassions that "Failing to plan is planning to fail". And each time he says it I just burn up inside because all he's talking about is the importance of staying efficient, and I have to hold myself from saying, "Yeah, but what about God."

And I guess it's great to have a sense of what you want, and to move in that direction, but what of crossing paths with someone who doesn't meet the profile? Is it a waste to give attention when you've already decided they don't have what it takes? Part of me thinks to do so is to miss out on the small moments.

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